13 Years Later

Finally able to push through this account of mine which thank God it is still alive!

Hello people of the blogsphere, which I have no idea if anyone reads this, and welcome to this mini update about 13 years later. For starters this page is 21 years old now, older than the age of my first post (way back 2005) and 2 decades in existence that emerged from the trying times of the Internet; think of dial-up net source, YouTube was still new and no influencers or Instagram in sight.

I had the chance to re-read my entries before posting, just wanted to know what I was like and missing the nostalgia. It is true that once you reach your 30s, all the things that kept who you were younger will be as enticing to revisit or to perform again. Blogging was definitely my escape from my troubles of youth. I treated it as a diary, a hobby, a way to practice writing like storytelling and not something that you can monetize on. It made me sane for most part since social media was different unlike now.

            Back View from a park in HCM

So yeah, here's to some 5 random updates about myself: (typing this thru phone and would never dream of it!)

> currently 37, unmarried and no kids; does it bothers me? yes and no but I have come to accept that my purpose would be taking care of children as a form of service. I am open but I dunno, just going with the flow on what life will bring

> stopped posting here coz life happened and yes my late 20s to early 30s were a whirlwind of ups and downs, all beautiful memories regardless how ugly or bad it was, they made me who I am now

> lost some relationships with people that I posted about or with on this blog both high school and college. Just accepted that there are certain relationships that are just chapters of your life, not from finish to end.

> learned a lot about myself thru work, family and friends that are still here. Haven't tried taking the NCLEX again (took it last 2011) nor working abroad as nurse as originally planned. I work in corporate now since 2016 thru a medical device company and honed my skills on how to deal with different types of people. And yes I still have no idea which way to go but my doors are still open to work at a hospital or an office set up that is related to my profession. Climbing up a managerial post is not my cup of tea but somehow it naturally found it's way on my work desk

> all the guy crushes I mentioned on this blog are now married and have kids hahahahaha. I do have them as acquaintances and it's funny on how the emotions and mental stress it took me to understand before reaching 25 years old. I guess it's part of life. Somehow reading my college flutters are funny now since it took me a while to remember the names and faces on the codenames being used. My preferences may have changed but I still love food, the color gray, music and writing.

Lastly, I am not angry about the world anymore. I have a good relationship with family, I tend to voice out more and understand their views once I got older. I just stick to what matters, being considerate and kind to others, having integrity especially at work and maintaining my inner peace. 

This soul is STILL wandering and yes I am getting old. Some questions were answered but newer questions emerged as well so it's a never ending cycle. I hope I could still witness all and be able to share it here then.

        Missing the neon signs from Saigon

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Ola! (quick post)

Hello there kiddos! I really don't know if anyone does read this side of the net but hey I just want to say a big HI!

It's been months since I last posted and there were loads of things that happened that I can't even put into thoughts LOL

I don't know I guess everyone is busy doing their own thing and yes I just had some temporary runs on my net connection so I'll be forced to get on haitus again... Blame it on the brother since he's taking the board exams again this April 11.

As for other news, work is fun! I guess because the people I work with are a blast. The only bothered thing would be most of them are single ladies so I'm kinda labeled as one of them. WTH! It's not like I'm looking for anything serious hahahha just a guy to hang with.

with the PICU staff on the beach

Been constantly partying almost every weekend. Make that every off from work... It was fun but then kinda get's tiring... Usually I don't enjoy it but the company I have are great! Even though there are different people I still enjoy it though, brings me to a euphoria state where I can forget the problems... LOL (unsa ni high?)

 still with these people on partying! hahahaha

Usually I spend a lot of time keeping fit. I guess it all started when you're the only girl in a group of three and they are like eating veggies while you are stuck on an oily pizza. Peer pressure? I guess but it was time to get on the healthier side since my lifestyle composes of getting booze and jump up early. Trying on getting back with those high heels as well like college days but I need to keep my legs in control. As of the moment though, I'm on hibernating from all of this coz I think my health is being compromised.

The reason I had this quick post would be that my phone was missing. It's a first time for me so it's kinda shocking at first but then kevs. It's not yet paid fully so i have to pay for it plus the pictures and memories from that phone would be priceless. That phone and I spend more than a year, being there with my good and bad in betweens. Yeah the in betweens. I should have backed it up though. Hai so the plan now would to find a temporary phone for communication.

we three still together! hahahaha

Anyhow, I'll be returning to Bora for my summer trip this year. That I'm looking forward to... I had some minor sands and beaches here though but that would be my main event! Yeah basically I want changes this year... I just want to prove again to myself that this would be tough but I can get through this...

'Til next post... I'll try to make this blog alive again! Seems like my tweeks on the sidebar aren't working anymore.. oh well.. It's good to blog!

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Sincerely, Your Past

Since I like to read my previous posts, I came to have this idea about writing myself a letter 10 years from now. Go ahead and be a witness to my shame hahahahahaha. Plus it would be a great present for me also in the future. 

 somehow sees the future as very colorful [image source]

Dear 33 year old me,

If you are reading this now and on your 30’s, I congratulate you for still keeping this blog alive! I don’t know what’s your status in life is but I’m pretty sure you’re not regretting any of it.
 

First of all, how’s life on the 30’s? If you’re married and have kids, well congrats! Never pictured out that yet in my mind and dunno what kind of mother I would be. As for the kids, I know I hate them now but when they are my creations I think I’ll have second thoughts about that. As for your husband, well he’s a lucky bastard to have you. He must be someone who knows respects and trusts you so well. If neither of the things mentioned above happened, then single isn’t bad… Think of it as an excuse to indulge your time on some glorious things like travel, eat and be merry. Just don’t be getting too caught on close friends being married… your time will come soon. Marriage is a serious step which you can’t easily erase.
 

As for your family, I hope you have a healthy relationship to all three of them. Remember to be good with the parents and that you already repay them somehow. They may have pissed you off loads of time but the work they put unto the education you have is priceless. They have raised you well and my 23 year old self can tell you that. Plus I hope the lessons we learned from them were helpful on the way. As for your only sibling, he’s annoying and a pain in the ass but he’s a good boy. He’s nicer than you. You should thank him that he has saved you in crises during college days. You should treat him somehow with something he likes or just say something nice to him. Since he shows more feelings than you hahahaha (not gay)
 

Are you still in contact with the close friends of college and high school? I should expect no matter the distance. How are Lara and Carmi? i guess both are married and merrier on their lives with kids, living their dreams and gorgeous hubbys.
 

As for your career, I just hope you are on the place which suits you. I mean if you can still remember that you were still struggling in the hospital doing endless perineal washes to patients and sometimes be depressed about it. Yet it was a pain emotionally that you felt there was something wrong or maybe you just needed to adjust on matters. Still I support you from where angle you are now.
 

As for the rest of the other aspects, just stay grounded. Never forget the simplicity of being you. I dunno if I gained o lost any weight but hey I’ll still accept it dba? I will be really waiting for a reply though for this letter and don’t you ever forget it…
                                

Sincerely,
   Chez the 23 version

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Buzz (an update)

Been days since I've posted something here in my blog due to some reasons that I am so proud off...

the buzz! as what Boy Abunda would say on tv every sunday [image source]

I start when I got the call from the hospital I was hoping to get in, kinda hectic since the ferry and boat tickets were full. I was able to bought one without any hassle and I was rescheduled so was ok...The thing I was embarrassed to share was that my parents secured something, a letter to one of the owner's siblings. It was stated that I was eligible for the position. Really don't like a thing about getting that kind of 'help'. Of course I protested but my mom insisted to give it anyway since it wasn't easy to secure such thing plus the competition of landing a job on a prestigious hospital is so high. My parents were friends on the social circle of the administration, my pride wouldn't allow it. Instead of passing it, I just hid it from anyone else. I had no guts to face the administration or who what so ever and present such thing. Literally I called myself mad but I risked myself on it. I didn't have any second thoughts or whatso ever that I wouldn't get in. Yes I did get in which I am so proud of myself. Even my parents thought because of that letter is the reason why I did. It feels wonderful that somehow thinking positively instead of worrying is really a great help! As for the letter, let's just say I'm keeping it, a reminder that anything is possible once you set your mind to it...

As for other aspects of life, my old friends from college are back! It sort of a mini get together since we usually don't get to chance to sit down and talk... It was a relief from all the new aspects of life that we are facing and that I got to see that without constant exposure, we still manage to sit down like we were yesterday. The psych part of it all is that, I never ever told my whole being but they manage to know me by actions. Somehow conversations with meanings fuel me up. You see when I entered junior college, everything went so fast. I was caught by the academics plus the social scenes that I was in to. The new friends I hang out with gave importance to parties and gossips. I never know from the fact that I was doing this and that when eventually today, it bores me. Yes it does depend on the people you’re with but that kind of pleasure only lasts for hours. But the meaningful conversations would last for years, so I guess that’s what I find weird. It did occur to me however that some people just have different views in life and yes the things I questioned myself before finally answered just by sitting down and talk.

I never felt happy or so far great ever since. The practice of living positively is so wonderful but there are some points you have to master. Thus again I'm sharing rather pushing people to stop worrying.

balancing between work and earning extra [image source]

The hectic schedules I have between my work and the network marketing I have is killing me though. I want to master the two of them but I have to cling to my job first, which is kinda hard right now but non the less. This is want I want and I have to live up to it.

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