Showing posts with label reaction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reaction. Show all posts

Monday, November 25, 2013

#BangonOrmoc

I guess you probably know the news already for days now. It’s been two weeks since the one of the strongest typhoon had hit my dear country and left hundreds of damages, debris and death. The super typhoon Yolanda/Haiyan hit the Philippines last November 8,2013. The route of the typhoon mostly hit the eastern part of the Visayan island group around 8 in the morning Philippine time. The cities and towns of Leyte including Tacloban, Palo and Ormoc were hit and well chaos turned over leaving also questions to what happen, who to blame and the actions of the national government.
a motivational sign that stood amidst the ruins [pic from instagram]

During the date I was in Cebu at home fresh from my night shift duty. It started raining earlier but was still manageable. The winds got stronger around 10 AM but yeah was reluctant enough to be inside, safe and dry. It lasted 2-3 hours and during the afternoon it mostly drizzled. My brother and I started contacting my folks since we knew that Ormoc is usually passed by typhoons yet no replies or calls since the evening. Didn’t panic yet until the images and video posts emerged from the net later that night, then I was getting worried.
 
The feeling of panic when you can’t contact from your loved ones from more than 24 hours is a torture. It’s like a fucked up time bomb. Your mind creeping to things morbid. I despise it. Still can remember those three days without any news from them, mostly images and videos from reporters weren’t helping. I was able to contact one aunt but was weak due to some family issues they have so still no idea if my folks were ok.
 
Finally my father replied with “Ok ra mi but wala na atop” (We’re fine but we have no roof). It did sounded like my father so yeah it was great to hear from them. I was then able to contact the rest of the relatives hours later. My parents were chill enough but my aunts weren’t, some of them sounded panicky. You don’t want to sit next to a panicky person, sucks big time and contagious too. Thanks to them, I was on a frenzied mode of helping out and just be at home straight away. My parents were against it but I insisted. I was torn between going home or not since rumors of looting during ship docking spread like wild fire. It made me angry hearing some of it. According to the media, Tacloban was a war zone filled with people that were desperate for survival even led to some killings and rape. I don’t know it was a shocker but knowing mostly Tacloban people have this “indifferent” attitude I guess. Don’t get me wrong, I have friends who are Warays (People of Tacloban due to the dialect they spoke) but mostly they have this ego which I don’t like to describe it further. Yet these people are peace loving.

Together with the brother, we headed to Ormoc day 5 after the Yolanda incident.

the pier and first shot when I arrived

the city park [ pic from twitter]

the roofless city terminal which is located near the pier [pic from twitter]

The port and the pier looked like a giant garbage wasteland from the docks. No trees, everything was a mess icluding the park and the heat was killing it. The city was even more devastating to look at seeing that every structure, house or commercial space, was a victim. good thing they opened the fire hydrants around the area for water . The wet market along with some grocery stores were on business but with limited time due to no electtricity. Banks were slowly having transactions during day 6 after yolanda.

view from the neighborhood in Mejia

my house with the brother on the it

the neighbor's house across the street

During the night, it was creepily quite. Although we have the moon to shed some light on, the city was awkwardly silent. Some fire hydrants had this scheduled availability for water so mostly my job was to bring water and the schedule was around 7 in the evening, yep dark.

my grandmother's home in Linao which was blocked by trees

inside my grandmother's home, the floor covered in water

There were lines everywhere if you want to buy anything from grocery, hardware and gasoline but mostly Ormocanons were patient enough. People were manageable I guess since the former typhoon Uring (Ormoc Flash Flood) which hit Ormoc last November 5, 1991 was heavier. Uring swept the city with floods that left 5 thousand killed. After that, bridges and dams were maximized and ever since no heavy floods have been reported. People told me that Yolanda was stronger  and more destructive than Uring but the casualties were only 30. They were ready enough and my folks survived it.

the waiting line on Gaisano Riverside, a mall and grocery store

the city Maternity Hospital which was perished

trees torn down along the gates of the city church

The only unruly settlement was the relief goods. Its been 6 days since the typhoon and not a batch of relief goods came. The media and some people were in desperate for help and thus came the questions of the unfit from the national government.  It took a week for the goods to arrive in Ormoc.

I hate politics but it was too much. The president was mostly blaming the local governments in Leyte of the unpreparedness. The people were prepared but didn’t expect of how strong it was. Reasons behind delayed of the goods were due to the DSWD who again repacks them with seals from elected officers where in fact the people were the one who brought them, not having enough vehicles to bring the goods where in fact during last election, the candidates were able to reach the smallest roads with their campaign and just keeping the goods on factories until they were spoiled or perished due to rain.  Some of the officials had made a fool of themselves against international medias like CNN and BBC. The interviews led to how dirty Philippine Politics is and made some unruly responses from Filipinos across the world. It’s about time for the whole world to know and yes I guess they were challenged big time. They were loads of issues being raised but then our own media can be biased against it all.

There were hundreds of people from northern Leyte fled to safer cities like Cebu and Manila. Every terminal and dock were packed with people. Even when we were leaving for Cebu, the pier had become an evacuation center for some waiting for the scheduled boats to arrive.

people scavenge for electricity to contact their loved ones [pic from child fund]

Spent just 3 days at home but I wasn’t that devastated. I witnessed the people I came from are stronger and that the goodness of humanity still exist. Ormoc may not be a glamorous city but its people have strong fighting spirits. Even under the heat and finding ways of rebuilding homes, people still managed to joke around and smile. They still also managed to help each other especially on neighboring communities. My photos posted aren’t enough to say how much it felt like being there. To my fellow Ormocanons, I salute you! Survivors twice in the making.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Knocking on Mr. Brain: The Intro


Random thought 1: Reasons

Is there a possibility of a situation that exist without any reasons? No
Everything happens to a reason according to philosophy.
Reasons exist because of choices. The choices we used had consequences. So man invented parallel universe for other choices to exist.
Curse you song from D’sound entitled ‘Do I need a Reason’ for these stanzas to live
I wonder what kind of parallel universe my other selves look like. I solemnly wish for this universe to have the 5 wishes granted.
1 wish down! Four remains and the 4th one is fast approaching. This September.



Random thought 2: Drying Undergarments
The random thought 1 had to die soon because of my eyes.
My brother had invented a faster way of drying undergarments in doors overnight.
How? By tossing it like a hula hoop of course.
Physics should be the winner of all of this with the help of air.
Not only that it’s helpful, its fun too. You’ll be imagining like a cowboy, with your undergarment as a rope to catch the bad guys
He’s been using this method for a year now. To my surprise it worked. No failed experiments
His best clients, my two cousins: a girl and a boy
Spotted both of them tossing undergarments on the balcony and inside the bathroom
Hang it dry near an air conditioning or electric fan for better results


Random thought 3: Coffee

Been on thinking about it lately, it’s become my source of energy
Worst part, it has been kind of a vitamin
Happy that I’m living healthily with no alcohol for almost 2 months now
Yet the suspect now is coffee, especially the caramel macchiato of Starbucks
Tried the non caffeinated ones like the hot chocolates from Coffee Bean and Bo’s
But the espresso shots are like love bugs calling me
So now I’m broke as hell with all the caffeine inside of me
Plus I’m like a walking zombie wanting some coffee instead of brains

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Ping Me: an Update

This would be just an update to what I’m busy with.
First my eligibility for NCLEX had arrived and that I surely taking a serious mode on the review thingy. So my schedule is tight with watching anime or series and reading mangas still intact. I’m so happy that I am able to reach katekyo hitman reborn’s latest episode. As of the moment, the latest episode is 190. Just 20 episodes to go and that I’m done, pure stream and that veoh player was my alibi on this. As for the mangas, kurushitsuji is so damn slow on the progress but the latest chapter is pretty good.

yes its cracking...
image by morrighan03

As for the other aspect, my brother has its own laptop and my cousin has a new notebook too. That leaves to me the eldest with the old pc. Damn! Just you wait for earnings and I’ll buy my own laptop. Still on bargaining my father not to disconnect our smartbro and to buy a router to have wifi! Inches to make him say yes hahahaha

Fifa is on the corner. The team I’m betting is still alive! Go argentina! I hope you do good on the quarter finals… betting on Gonzalo Higuain to do that stuff! Spain isn’t bad also plus those Germans do know how to play a good game with the crowds wowing!

Back to NCLEX, I’m having trouble with my friend wait frenemy on when to take the NCLEX. I wanted to take it on September, she wanted to take it on August. August is still early for me since I started second week in June to get my studying straight! Plus she’s the one who decided to stop with the review! If only I decided to ditch her, but that would be rude. My brain hurts, wanting to take with her or should I take alone. My mom bets on taking alone just to make sure. Her mother doesn’t allow her to extend, but I already gave up time on for her to decide but taking it early is a very huge risk. Not only that it’s expensive, but a one time take since the California state requires their state’s SSS number. I can’t do that! I’m still sticking September as my target month, I’m just being careful not reckless. The worse part is that the reason she wants an early take is that a hospital already called her and took the exam. I wasn’t even able to pass the requirements because I was afraid that it would clash on my exam date. Plus she’s not even sure if she passed the exam. It’s not my problem, I already told her that possibility but she pursued it anyway. I don’t want to go with her decision since she already made a wrong one before. I answered her that by the end of July she would get an answer from me.

its a love angle not triangle
image by iann7


This isn’t my business but I can’t stand it. Regards to my brother on his new chic he found. You see this chic was the same person my brother’s best friend tried to court. He failed but didn’t give up that yet. As for one thing my brother, his best friend and this chic are classmates so ultimately they would see each other in school. The best friend however kinda let it slide of courting the chic since he always gets busted. I don’t know if my brother asked any permission or had any closure with his best friend but they stop talking after my brother when for that chic. As for that chic, I don’t know. I feel irritated I mean she obviously know that they are super close friends what the hell he said yes to my brother. As for my brother, what on earth was he thinking ditching his long time friend for a girl! Man its like total wreck, another good relationship went down because of that. I have nothing against that chic, it’s that her action made me judge right away that she has a defect or something. Typing about it makes me annoyed but I can’t stand it! My own brother blinded with that! Typically that couple won’t last knowing my brother but then again I don’t about his best friend though. I even told my brother that clearly he’s the wrong guy on this scenario. He just laughed and won’t listen. Fine then go for the hard way.

Feels kinda relief after those paragraphs. As for other updates, I’m still being jailed for debts! When will this horror ends. Stupid stupid me for being suck a weakling on food! July is here and time time time is oh so precious. Procrastinating should stay away! I miss my friends, the close ones and that spending with frenemy is the only choice I got to be able to remind myself the horrible thing if I fail!

Saturday, June 05, 2010

Wedding anyone?

Half of the year has arrived and still I have no job nor took the NCLEX exam for once. Rainy months with school gates opening give back memories down when I was so excited to have my very cool pencil box and lunch money! Back then it was so simple that all I have to do is ace some exams so that parents would be proud of me… ok ok I have to admit I like to be praised a lot with what I accomplished. Hence I was kinda of a bookworm during elementary and high school days. College changed my vision drastically. Its more like what you want what you do what you get sort of persona. Independence. Oh yes I still love to be praised but my basic instincts on adjusting with people took that away eventually led me to a persona that watches people a lot, from different angles I guess. Now here I am typing this as a person who likes to see people go up, down and down some more.

Missing school? Hell no! It’s the people I guess… never actually pictured out that someday I would actually share these stuffs to a simple site; plus who would waste their time reading on this. A year passed, so what now? For some few friends of mine, they have the job, passed the exam or better yet married.

Intimacy vs. isolation as what Erik Erickson mentioned on the social developmental task of a human being, the young adult.

Physically mature but emotionally flat and spiritually evil. Those words suit me very nicely. For the social aspect? I’ll get to you in that…in due time.

Weddings have been an astonishing fantasy of every girl since childhood (bride wars movie), hmm not to me that is. Yet, in our section in college we h
ave the most number of people married already. Reasons? Unwanted pregnancy? Could be but lets rephrase it to unplanned pregnancy. How about love?? Maybe. Every time I asked a newlywed, they would answered they were sure of the decision and not at least regretted about it. Not quit answering my question. I’m not totally convinced but seeing them tying the knots could be a thrilling more like nerve-racking experience for them. Plus I always check the in-laws reactions of during the whole ceremony thing, that’s the best part of having this early marriages stuff. The in-laws usually give the clear meanings to the wedding.


Yes I have my own life but like I said I enjoy watching people going up, down and down some more. Not saying that marrying early is so bad, it’s that some are going there
where I’m here stuck. Stuck on keeping company to myself.


As of now I have clearly no plans of having kids or whatsoever, remember the word independence. This term has been engraved on my skull that my priorities is to get a really nice en route to my life towards traveling and repaying people that I love.




Ok ok I’ll explain my so-called dream wedding even if it’s not really ideal as of the moment. I’m just thinking of stuff to write but hey it’s June and I’m giving the mic to my ego for a change:


Ø I like to have both church and civil weddings
Ø Must be on an autumn month
Ø I like the idea of an autumn themed wedding complete with the maple leaves
Ø Single bridesmaids & groomsmen would be a plus sign
Ø Ceremony on the beach wait make it a park since its autumn themed
Ø No idea who my maid of honor would be
Ø Reception? No idea but the food must be great maybe a 4-5 coursed meal
Ø Cake? I dunno just not white and boring
Ø High school and college with relatives should be there
Ø The color rust and gold would be great
Ø Would be a day that it’s the happiest

Mainly that’s it… and for the record, I predict that none would be in my so called lists hahhahaha anyways
I’m introducing some friends of mine who tied the knot earlier this year.

(1) Juzzy with hubby Micheal (2)Clauds with main squeeze Mckoy

(3) Harvey with Jkae (4) Xiang with hubby Janjan


(4) Marie with herman Duke (5) my teacher Diana with husband Earl

Friday, March 12, 2010

Talented

I’ll like to mention some favorite artists that I have witnessed so far in the face of the earth. I just like to compliment them since they are simple people yet with extraordinaire talents.

Music is one of my utmost past time. I even tried playing some instruments… and currently learning percussions; it isn’t easy. I’m still looking er rather waiting for the perfect teacher for me. I wish it would be soon…

The Great Ishii Yasushi

I think Ishii Yasushi is a genius! He is a Japanese composer, songwriter and musician. This guy can do every genre there is! From rock to ballad, jazz to classical and eletronic to punk! Its like, he’s a cd mold into one. His masterpieces are amazing. I tumbled upon him when I fell in love to the compositions behind Hellsing! But then I wasn’t that curious enough until he did the soundtrack on Darker than Black season 2! The beats and tempo are amazing plus he can shift very easily. He knows what notes to use in a given scenario. Do check some of his pieces below.





He’s also an indie artist in Japan, dunno on what his working on but according to his blog; his latest album was on the darker than black soundtrack hehhe

I’ll be hooked for sure on this.

I can’t find any differences between a stage actor and a film actor. Hmm maybe those in the stage acting, mistakes aren’t accepted easily.

Carey Mulligan as Kitty Bennet (Pride and Prejudice) and Jenny Mellor(An Education)

Anyhow, this young actress named Carey Mulligan, an English actress, caught my attention. I never thought she was the sweet character playing Kitty Bennet (the youngest Bennet sister) on 2005 Pride and Prejudice. Eventually, it seemed that her acting career went slow and secure. But her performance in the movie An Education was moving actually. I second the motion on all the nominations and awards she received with that role. Plus she’s still young but bagged a lot for being an actress too. Started out so young, this actress in seen in tv shows and stage performance in London. Her simplicity in delivering her roles what amazed me the most.

Together with Shia LaBeouf and pictured with David Kross in the Berlin Awards

Oh yeah she’s been dating Shia LaBeouf since 2009. All I have to say is best wishes to both of them and for the talent she showed to the world.

Voice acting has got to be the most awesome job! Personally I would love to have one but I guess I still lack the capability of shifting my voice hehehe

When I came across the character soundtrack of soul eater, the voice by Death the Kid (fave character in the series) has an awesome voice while singing. After googling it I found some awesome stuff bout the voice actor.

Mamoru Miyano on his album cover Discovery

His name is Mamoru Miyano, he’s a seiyu, actor and singer as well. No wonder Death the Kid has a good voice. Plus he had given voices to some familiar yet cool characters in the anime world! One of them includes Zero Kiryu from Vampire Knights and Kira (Light Yagami/L second) from Death Note! Wow two addicting characters and still I had no idea that they were voiced with the same person! He also played the hilarious Tamaki Souh from Ouran and Haruto Sakuraba from Eyesheild 21! Mostly he voiced a lot but man this guys can handle from twisted to baka-acting characters!


Start Upper Left to Right: Light Lagami, Zero Kiryu, Death the Kid and Tamaki Souh

Well he’s an actor and he did won an award for Kira’s voice. Man if I can remember correctly how Kira’s evil laugh usually plays on the series really it gave me the creeps! I will have to find some mp3 that has Kira’s laugh in it!


In order: *not complete
(1)Nodacchi - Gakuen Alice (2)Kiba - Wolf's Rain (3)Ling Yao - Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood (4)Riku - Kingdom Hearts (5)Tamaki Suoh - Ouran High School Host Club (6)Ichiru and Zero Kiryu - Vampire Knight (7)Chaoji Han - D.Gray-man (8)Moondoggie - Eureka Seven (9)Naoto Oizumi - Love Love (10)Death the Kid - Soul Eater (11)Haruto Sakuraba - Eyeshield 21 (12)Sho Fuwa - Skip-Beat! (13)Kuro - Kurozuka (14)L.A. - El Cazador de la Bruja (15)Aoba - Tokimeki Memorial Only Love (16)Setsuna F. Seiei - Mobile Suit Gundam 00 (17)Rikuson - Kotetsu Sangokushi (18)Light Yagami - Death Note


Thanks to TwinNeedle for uploading this video in youtube.


Friday, February 26, 2010

Almost

Ever wonder what will your fate would be If a situation was meant to happen? Or ‘almost’ happened but some external circumstances just happen to but in?
Thus, man invited the idea of parallel universe, hoping maybe that something or someone happened in front of you and that your present existence would be that bad or good…

yeah almost...
jayxxbe

Hmmm I guess you could say it as the “what ifs” of life without any regrets though rather relief’s… regrets are another thing but then these situations of mine are my ‘almost’ moments that made me realized what a disaster would that be if it went on…

True these situations are embarrassing but what the heck! Only 3 people I know who read this blog, so go ahead I’ll make some parts of my past see through…

1. Almost said yes to a wrong guy

This happened way back in junior high… I was naive then, more like a new bird being set free… I guess ‘puppy love’ was the term mostly used before… (Just relate to this post for further details about this guy) maybe because it was the first time somebody treated me like a princess or the most beautiful girl in the world… and that I was blinded by the thought of having my first love… you know what I mean about those stuff way back in your high school… just because he said something about your face, the way you dress, its like your in love… but then my mother said something about being practical in life… and she was the one who told me that just because your peers are doing it, you should do it too… true I was carried away by the idea of being in a relationship rather than how I truly feel…. What did I feel? It was more like a childish act like having a new toy, getting excited and all; since everything happened so fast and the guy was also the one who said that I was not a hassle girl after all… as time goes by, I was getting bored of it… and he was being a jackass for everything… like being a puppy everywhere I went, it made me nuts! He would be mad If I don’t reply asap, asking random and meaningless questions and saying that how he change because of me and all that crap. It was getting too much and its like having cuddies slowly. Really it was sick, I guess I’m really an opposite kinda of a girl since over doing praises spoils my mood.

So I ended it all, without saying a word and I have to admit I’m the bad guy in this scenario… oh yes he got mad at me but still I remained silent… even until now, I will just look at him, smile and stay away as possible…

2. Almost dated my teacher’s brother

This is a funny one, I was in senior high and that time chatting through MIRC was the trend. Friendster and Myspace were still hit on teens about online socializing… Ironically, we had a very very slow net connection at home because it was landline. So mostly on weekends or free days I went to net café’s and do just about everything there (i.e. blogging). One event, I was chatting through MIRC and went to our local channels since mostly my friends are there… I forget what screen name I used though. A lot of screen names then popped up, usually I entertain them, sometimes not, it depends on what I’m doing so that day I just went entertaining people… mostly people asked you details like location, sex and age, then next would be other details like if your still in school, single or other questions like that (you know what I mean) so this particular screen name said some outrageous stuff, I was hooked totally since we had some similarities like food, anime, music… he then gave me his email so that we could be friends in fs, I checked his profile, was ok since his pic was on anime… so I sent a friend request. Little do I know, that he was just in the same café in the same time like I was. I never mentioned that which café I was at, but then suddenly someone pulled my shirt and said oi! I was confused. He said he was ---- (I forgot his screen name), to my surprise I was shaking! Hahahha it was weird I mean he was the one sitting at my left side all along and I didn’t even notice it. He can’t be stalking me or anything since the monitors were in dividers. We shook hands but I said to him he looks familiar, he said her older sister is working as a teacher in my school waaaah which was kinda weird… still I was shaking, I made an excuse that my mom was waiting for me already, eeek! He asked for my num and I gave it to him! I was shocked on why on earth did I do that! Anyways, he was in college already and that we shared something common ‘daw’ (usually that’s what his texts all about) finally what I dreaded the most happened, what if we could hang out? Totally I’m a paranoid in these stuff but I usually pulled off some excuse, it worked but then again he would caught me during Fridays outside school, hai good thing his ate was there hahahha at least I won’t be alone with him… its not like his ugly or a meanie but then again I wasn’t ready for that part because of what happened during junior high hahahha and the only time we were alone was like 10 mins outside my school buying food… I guess he noticed that I was kinda scared of him… he backed off as time passed. Weird I never saw him again ^^

3. Almost went together to a complete stranger

This is what I would always say about alcohol! Its make your life miserable… it happened in college, we were having fun with my 3 friends at a local club. Alcohol was like an SOP on those cases, usually I ended up having too much and usually the effects are releasing your inner wildness inside. I wasn’t like super wild, more like just enough to kick in the effect of the alcohol… usually I don’t dance, but when I’m in a drinking spree, my feet are uncontrollable! Its like they are program to move every rnb song there is… hahahaha

I was jumping up and down when suddenly someone jumped out and down together with me… usually I don’t entertain strangers, but since I was having so much fun in my life I let it all behind… next thing I could remember was that he was there right in front of me smiling his ass off… I suddenly stop and sat down since I was sweating already… my other friend was dancing while the other one was with me… she needed to smoke so I joined with her. That smiling ass was following with us all the long and that he thanked me for having a blast. (grabbing my hand which was weird) He then invited us if we would like to dine with them, I wasn’t in a mood since he’s a stranger… that smiling ass introduced himself and I’m pretty sure it was a lie… (hating grabbing my hand I just grabbed it back) good thing my friend rejected it too but he kept on begging… I said no… he then asked if we needed a ride, I said no my friend has a car (we went there through taxi). Even though I was a lil drunk, I was pissed by someone who keeps on begging we don’t even know the guy for crying out loud… finally someone I know came hahahha and that we need to go back inside… at least he just smiled there and went to his car… we said goodbyes and until this very day I still wish I would never see his face again!


I think I should stop here; there are other sets of almost moments maybe next time if I can remember posting them ^^

All I could say that, I’m happy on what I’m doing right now! Those were not regrettable scenarios, both scary and hilarious moments of my life…’til next segment on this.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Ugly Love

Before I could scream all of my angst inside there are some major points I would like to clarify. I have never been in to a serious relationship so how do I know all these stuff? I guess people are so into that state that when it comes to failing or broken hearts, I’m just unluckily there… gathering all data er more like witnessing them that it comes in all forms. No I am not a love guru or an expert as the matter of fact, but I think the data I gathered are quite sufficiently enough for me to speak my mind off.

Its true being in love is one of the greatest thing that man will ever experience. At least you have the reason to look forward unto the day, or that someone would rescue you from all you woes or having someone who just loves every bit and piece of you including your teeth.

One aspect I can see clearly is that there are no permanent happy endings. When we were young, tv has probably feeding us inputs that are more on the positive sides of life. Yeah there’s like a little part when the evil triumphs but hey! Who wants evil to win in a movie right?? Luckily, life has its little secrets to feed us (reality) and it goes by with us. More like wheels, going up and down, up and down again… that stuff… thus divorce was born! People just easily get married and if happy ending runs out pooof! Lawyers and papers kicks in. I don’t get it; marriage is like a really big step and here we are in this world practicing man and woman to be easily divided just by signing some papers. Mind you only the lawyers gain all the profit…

Torn apart by sailor-midnightstar

One funny data I also see is that people all get really really crazy when it comes the love agenda. Either way, all I could say is plain over reacting. One situation is even if the couple are still together likely one partner would pull something pathetic which maybe kinda weird more likely creepy hahaha, fine fine the partner is just being sweet right? Really there are just some people that just takes over the lives of one’s partner… more like the boss or like the master puppeteer… females usually do this controlling their partner’s movements, kinda sucks for being in his shoes don’t you think? I mean give the guy his privacy, because too much isn’t healthy. Plus trust him, he’ll come back to you like a lost puppy for sure. (unless your putting him too much trust, that he’s cheating on you tsk tsk tsk) like what my cousins say, respect and communication should be there… (this part here was all their idea hehehe)

As for the other aspect, hitting splits Ville. All I could think about this one is the inner wildness in us more like the inner jealousy in us just takes over all our existence. Its like your partner just hit you really good and the wake up call comes in different things: revenge, remorse or killing thyself. It’s still ugly…

Next would be the sex thing. Every guy just wanna get laid. Usually they prefer doing it being the first one to a gal, I dunno maybe it’s like a male dominance thing. Since mostly I’m surrounded with overflowing testosterones in my family, this topic has been more like a common conversation. Believe me, it was weird at first but then those guys did teach me something… yes I’m a girl but just because I see a naked photo of I guy that doesn’t mean I’m hitting trough orgasm… I guess girls are hard to please hahaha

Trapped by Love? by LordMishkin

The only nuisance about girls is that doing it first to a guy and then when they broke up, the girl just go berserk and all. Yes we live in a conservative country, and that virginity is sacred to us but why go nuts? I’m not blaming them for anything but 75% of it belonged to them since they let their man do it. But because the guy loves you and all still it’s your responsibility, only girls have the rights to be in that position or not. (except for rape) Personally, I guess its ok to be devirginize now a days and mostly people see it as part of society; slowly accepting though… but just remember the balance beam, cause the risk factors are quite huge compared to 10-15 minutes of pleasure. And oh practice it safely too.

So far, those are my data that are clearly to see. Hmmm there are other aspects too, like the age gap, mistresses, unrequited love and cheating. Mostly these are depict on movies... Love just not all sunny days you know...

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Spilling the Beans

Like most people we have some really weirdness inside of us. It could be a monster, a sick habit or the biggest secret that you have to die if others will know. Yeah I guess watching anime made me think this way… the feeling that why on earth I was born this way or why on earth I have to deal with useless things! Like boredom or annoying people… maybe that’s the reason why I get pissed off I people tend to say cartoons to anime, hello! Cartoons are aimless! Their goal is to laugh your ass off i.e. spongebob. I admit that some anime have this shallow storyboard but then they kicked you right on the middle or the end. Like bubu chacha for example, what I learned from it that you can’t always please everyone and life’s too short to waste it; to think a baby and his talking car made me realize those hahhahaha

Still I am attached to this system I guess… although I can’t see myself as an otaku unlike before… (high school memories flashing!)

What I truelly find about my self that I can “mostly” relate to anime character are two things: soujiro seta’s smile and being a reaction formation



Seta’s smile is like a mask… you know what I mean… a façade that creates an illusion to everyone; basically just to put a good face or other words hide the true feelings! Hmmmmm basically I wear this smile, yes its genuine since I’ve been practicing it! How do I know if it’s effective?? They say that I always have an airy atmosphere like humming birds chirping sort of stuff or that they smile back and ask the reason for my being smileyness…. Either way all of them were fooled… no wonder that when I complained they still have to guess which interventions to keep me company. And for the record, I’m showing signs of a histrionic kind of personality, which is like way way off. The reason? I always tell everyone what I’m doing through sms… hmmm not quite since I have nothing better to do and that people ask me these stuff… still the seta’s smile works every time I’m in deep deep trouble


In psychiatry, reaction formation is someone who acts the opposite of what he truly desires to do. Yeah I’m really really like that! It’s like a hard habit, not that I’m medically ill that is, but I see myself doing stuff that I don’t want to. For example, I hate watching Filipino films but somehow I end up watching katorse (because of enchong dee) or that I kept on denying that I like someone so much during my review board days that when I was alone and saw him around the vicinity I usually had this action of saying hi to him with a big smile splattered on my face. So much for the denial part… so ok ok I think I guess this is kinda sick! Or I am sick, literally! I’m trying though as to say what’s on my mind but then I have second thoughts for I had an incident of being frank too much that end up having enemies of my own… life is so unfair

And I am so stubborn that I have these dilemmas of dealing with other people’s issues….
Intimidating?? Nah!

**mask image by hengki24