Embracing EDM

I have been a lover of music ever since elementary. Although my father preferred jazz,  I was hooked to different kinds of genre. I was a boy band fanatic (not so much), a punk wannabe yes even the screamo count, an otaku for anime song, house and rave person and an indie geek. The two later were developed during college. I usually like any song but as I grew up, the taste became picky. So listening to these different songs for years had developed to have some quite a challenge. A challenge to know who the artist when I hear a unique tune. To a sense that I just googled every lyrics to the said song or if there ain’t any, I usually record it. Thanks to some apps I can know the artist swiftly.

That’s how serious I am when it comes to music.

Enough about that, I just want to share some of my favorite EDM (electronic dance music) tracks. I can still remember the first time I heard them during college class. A classmate showed it to me and the rest was history. The song was from Daft Punk ‘s Technologic (not the actual video I saw before but this was close), it has an addictive lyrical input. Even the video was creepy. What kept me psyche was when these guys had a concert, all people where like bobbing their heads to the beat or jumping. It was having this feeling that I wanna be there in the crowd itself, badly.

Ironically house and rave were another genres which years before weren’t that into main stream. Unlike now, it’s everywhere. You can hear it now playing in radios and music channels. It also erupted to different categories like electro, progressive, deep and indie dance house tracks.

Below are my all time favorites! They are usually present on my playlist even it gets old:

Miike Snow - Pretender (Deniz Koyu Remix)

The original was kinda jazzy. Thanks to Deniz Koyu he magically made it addictive. I like playing the verse on my head and reciting the part ‘I didn’t wanna wake up but then I felt your touch’. First heard it from a friend who was generous enough to give me some songs. I owe him this song.

Porter Robinson – Language


This song is amazing! At first I was kinda hesistant but when keep on repeat it has some promise. Try imagining some tranquil japanese pond during the first part of the song and when it gets to the lower notes its like hitting a danger alarm button. He did balance the track nicely with some melow piano parts. Porter is one great talented dude. If you can check some of his live gigs you will jump for it, guaranteed!

Zedd – Codec


I adore Zedd! First heard him from beatport of his song Spectrum. It was too pop for me but then I tried checking his other works. From there I discovered some pretty good tracks. He did remixed some Skrillex songs and his Zelda tune was a good one too. Yet Codec is one I find it playing on repeat. It sounded like when the piano notes are on off key but the rest are in tune. I imagine tiny fireflies flickering wildly during that part. Plus the drop bass on the end is addictive which leads then to the first part of another track called Stache. Truly worth listening.

Mango and Andre Fraunstein ft Ludik – Disappear


This song has some good memories. Perfect chillax song after a hard day of partying. The lyrics say it all about driving on an open road where its almost sunrise, sitting next to you the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Utterly perfect and yes I had this moment years ago.

Calvin Harris – Flashback


This guy has been around for quite a while and he sings! First heard him on the youtube suggestions and this song was playing. I never knew djs can sing but well he does. I also like the video on this one where the camera is an eye view of a person walking and partying. He did mention that he preferred to be a dj rather than a singer. I dunno his voice is perfect to some of his tracks.

Sebastian Ingrosso and Alesso – Calling


This piece here reminds me of the days where non stop partying every weekend began; wasn't a party freak like years before. I still do like the version without Ryan singing. This song lead me to some new heights and I mean it! Higher feeling of high where you just jump to the beat at the chorus. The great part was I wasn’t alone during those times, I had friends who just like to jump off the problems away.

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Donna

I never realized that one of my friends from college would pass away so easily. Meet Donna, one of the persons I found interesting. I never quite fully understood her though but I did get the picture years back on sophomore Year College.

Don’t know why but I belonged to a group of the Chinese blooded. I guess we had click for some reasons. I mean their families are rich, I am not; they belong to some well-known titles in the city, where I came from the proud city of the Ormoc and they can speak chinese, whereas my father side does has Chinese blood but we don’t speak any language of some sort. Anyhow we just had this mutual understanding when it comes to making friends, we respects each other’s opinions and get along pretty well. Although at that time they didn’t quite hang around the night, but we were not a bad group either.
 

How can I describe Donna? We were not that super close but we stayed in touch years after she left the college…

With the gang L-R( Carmi, Donna, me, Ivane, Dan, Lara, Ken) way back early days celebrating Carmi's birthday on some ice cream (sorry for the crappy picture)

One thing, she was a generous person materialistically and yes she’s one of the friends you can talk to. She’s a person having sensible conversations. Downside was she was already sick when I met her. I presumed because of her sickness, she was kinda lazy. I respected her for all of that. There were some points about her I don’t get.
 

For once, she somehow hated her parents for doing the stuff for her. She is like all hate about them, but all I can see was that she should be thankful for having them, one of the nicest parents I ever met. Although she was quite emotional when it comes to her love life, I never understood why she was rushing to fall in love. Getting attached to mostly on the same sex. I know I’m being too judgmental about it but her partners were to me doesn’t suit her. If I have vices, well she was the first one who had them. She didn’t influence me though; I was just a witnessed to her actions of rebellion. That 

was what I thought…
 

Until I realized it why she was rushing things. I never quite saw it clearly.

 The last time I saw her was at her wake, such a shame never did the chance to visit on the hospital

I guess when you know that you have a time limit in this life, doesn’t matter to whom you share it with as long you can experience it. I salute her for that, instead of waiting for life to end  she took actions. She wants to be in charge of what is for her. Maybe we saw it as ill acts but I can't blame her for it.

I would agree on what her dad said about her, she’s one tough cookie on the outside. Never admits defeat and all but inside she’s emotionally fragile. I can still remember the times she cried a lot due to some stress of relationships, in school or family. She would somehow stare blankly in space when a song she likes hit her. She loves to sing that I can remember.

She may not see this post but again Donna would be one of those interesting people I’ll never forget.

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Quarter Life Crisis

Borrowed and read the book, It’s kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini. Practically light and fun to read which probably you could finish it by one sitting. I discovered there the term quarter life crises. As what my memory served me, it was like the half of the middle life crises or the age after your teen years where you have to face the reality.

 the book ain't bad, try reading it [image source]

So I googled this one since a friend of mine asked if this thing exist:

‘The quarterlife crisis is a period of life following the major changes of adolescence, usually ranging from the late teens to the early thirties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult. The term was coined by analogy with mid-life crisis.’

True it exists now since basically I think I have it…
 

According to Erikson’s 8 crises on human being, we have these social crises to overcome in every developmental stage. Adolescent has the identity vs. role confusion. I did however trouble on who I was way back but I did get over it. Young adulthood has intimacy vs. isolation. I guess I have trouble facing reality now due to some intimacy issues I guess. Funny when I just learned about this on college, I said to myself I didn’t experience nay crisis on every stage…yet. I was wrong. It all started to think about it when I had work. I guess I need to get out of there. Somehow work has drawn me into some self-hate. Due maybe to some circumstances of failed responsibilities or that it was so simple that I over analyzed it. Either way still I found some self-hate which scares me.
 

I guess I hate having responsibilities, but I need some finances to survive though. So should I quit then? Sooner maybe but I have to finish the contract then, as for now all I ask is to have passion on it.

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Future Generation

It’s correct that I am no longer in my teen years. When I was young then, I constantly remind myself that I shouldn’t be a nagger adult. I shouldn’t be an old lady who yells to little children and scolds them. I have this nightmare to turn into an old witch… an ugly old witch with no friends and stuff like that.

Time proved me wrong coz even if I’m not old, I’m complaining already to some stuff these youngsters are doing. Of course not all are like that but mostly are like a pain on the asses. I have no idea why but it seems the future of this generation has somehow going to be in need help.

the generation gap [image source]

So this country is a sticker to its traditions and stuff. Mostly Southeast Asian countries are like that, since we owe it to our ancestors to what we are now. The only thing is that the value of respect and trust are somewhat being abused by these youngsters nowadays. I am a person who likes to respect people and be respected also. It has come to a time where anyone can yell to each other, isn’t that kinda sad? The moralities have disappeared and maybe this can lead to small misunderstandings to great wars. You can’t completely trust anyone these days. Even if that being is your so called best friend or lover, somehow that person has some dark issues you don’t like to see. What led to this? Gossip and lies. White lies that eventually got way out of hand and you can’t seem to put away.

As for some concerns, overweight has become the problem to school age kids. I guess due to technology and net, kids prefer to play indoors with their own gameboy, xbox, playstations or pc for entertainment. What happen to those running around streets playing with hoops or skipping to patentero or other stuff like that? Time sure did change so fast. Yet the being a 90’s child has its ups and downs.

I think some 90’s child has to be blame. I mean mostly new couples are from that era. I guess it’s up to people from different ages on how to race children nowadays. Yes I’m complaining but I can’t guarantee when I become a parent, I can’t promise for my children to avoid such things. People influence by other people. Yet one thing I’m certain that I will teach them are the values that I treasure like what my father did to me and my brother; we had our conscience as guidance when we make decisions.

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When Singles Talk

It was like a scene from a movie, three friends in a car on a Monday night. Two girls and a gay guy shared some interests on what’s going on with their lives. I was one of the three having those conversations. It was on random stuff from careers to personal choices, yet it lead to this sort of topic which I find it funny.

more or less the night was like this, should have snap a shot for a remembrance hehehe [image source]

The other girl opened up about being single. I have totally stated this issue for like a hundredth time in my blog. What I find it funny was that I usually don’t get tied up in conversations like this. From hook ups to heart breaks or from marriages to unwanted pregnancies, my 22 years of existence taught me a lot of things. But honestly what l lack on is experience on the dealing of intimate relationships. I have to admit I sure do write about being on the negative sides of being in a relationship, hence I have low idea on what’s it’s like on the positive state of being in a relationship. Lots of couples made it clear the awesomeness of being in love and all that crap can bring yet what I find it convincing to be in such a relationship would be the companion of the opposite sex. A companion who would do anything and I mean anything.

I’m thankful for having awesome friends who tend to be crazy when I get lonely but you can’t avoid having those days when every friend of yours is kinda busy. The topic went on and on for like an hour or so talking about how lovely would it be, by someone who will be there always or just for someone to talk to. I tried raising my points though of patience and all yet being 2 against 1 didn’t work.

What I did however was telling them the existence of other aspects of life like career, family and friends. Still I know how they feel though since I was and now in my single hood in my early adult years. Tired of waiting I guess. It does get lonely and sometimes I perceive myself that maybe something is wrong with me. I just can’t figure out what. I mean look at other people who are not so average looking still can hook up with other people. My mother always reminds me of stuff like this about how the way I look and act. Really no one has knocking on my door for the past 10 years I think on my existence. Reinventing then? Kinda hard but as of now I am still convenient on the ways I manage my life. Do I really need to change just to get noticed by someone? My answer is no. Can’t do that I mean that wouldn’t be titled as me right? Yes it’s lonely but it’s more important to respect yourself first.

How about the points on the gay guy? Well let’s just say all he could think as of the moment was that he can get that intimacy stuff but true love is still missing. Sexuality has always been an issue just to get attraction but no passion is present. It’s like a simple attraction according to him no deeper feelings of genuine love. I guess being on the homosexuality stuff still got some issues on this country. I kinda get jealous on where they get their self confidence though. I have self confidence but not that way up like my friend.

I divert myself into thinking there are other stuffs more important than being in such a relationship. It’s kinda hard to do but like I said I have crazy friends! There are some other aspect of life that you have to go up and down with it, its balance you know. You can’t have all the luxuries in the different aspects.

Ironically the song entitled "I Don’t Need a Soul (to hold)" by Relient K fits perfectly to this post.

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Facing Dooms Day

Since I can't contain myself of not posting something this would be a very very very short update bout me.

I know been narcissistic for the past couple of days even my tweets and plurks are all about me me me...

Ok cutting it short, it is officially a week for me to face Dooms Day.

Dooms day = the Moment of TRUTH

Dooms day! Boom Day isn't bad as well [image source]

The every reason why i am still a bummer for like more than a year now...

Taking the NCLEX will be hard, there is no doubt about it even if i have to suffer myself again on endless quires and mind boggling questions just to be a nurse in the US.

I didn't ask for this but personally I have no intentions of getting a work..yet. But repaying the bills my parents had put one me would be such a sure blast...

Of all the month why October??

October to me is like the beer fest of all. Free booze everywhere and you don't have to worry about being hang over or making a fool of yourself, trust me been there!

This is what October is all about [image source]

It's where Halloween happens, my brother's birthday, college semester breaks and of course free pig outs with family and friends

Yeah i miss the pig out session with Lara on her home town, I can't believe that those mouth watering lechons are missing in action this month. I can still remember last year, riding on that hell of a centipede ride... good times!

Oh yes i forgot October is the feast day of Mother Mary of Rosary. No i hadn't prayed the rosary since October 1 but i did get to visit her church every week.

Unrelated to the NCLEX thingy are the anime shows!

Booooo almost all the on-going anime i usually update myself are done. Freaking 12 episodes! why on the hell they have to like limit to twelve episodes?! Kuroshitsuji was one hell of a weird ending! It's that Sebastian is stuck with Ceil... my poor Sebby stuck with a demon Ceil. HOTD (High School of the Dead) was good but the ending was terrible. There must They should have a second season for it! Occult Academy was weird but yeah still i find the ending quite happy. KHR (Katekyo Hitman Reborn) was a miserable one. I'm gonna miss Lambo wagging his cow suit but the ending wasn't that bad. It's just why do they have to stop there?! Must wait for 2011 then?! tsk this is bad so I am again on the mission on searching to fill up my anime goodness... Hit me if you have any suggestions, all ears here ^____^

On the manga part, the only thing i would like to comment was on Vampire Knights. I dunno the writers must have like Kaname and Yuki since they made again a story of Kaname not being the brother of Yuki, i dunno. It made my head swirl more and yeah Zero is still a pain the ass. He's acting bitchy too.

Yes i just like to breathe a little and be prepared for this exam...

The good thing was that i was able to fill myself up with lots of nice infos even if it took me alone to study. The net was helpful and a great friend offered her review materials. I guess God was really listening...

I survived reviewing alone :D [image source]

Keeping my fingers cross and yeah i have lots of pending post to finish too better start posting them next week! weeeeh

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Third SEX trending

Funny the question people ask these days is not if you’re single…

the third sexes [sources 1 & 2]

Try to guess… Yup it’s usually a question if you’re straight or not…

I know kinda creepy for a girl like who came from a country that somehow despise the practice of third sex… yet when you see clearly almost all the youngsters of this generation has somewhat blindly embracing the trends of western culture.

I get it we Filipinos can be copycats of our own but in some cases trending of hitting both sexes isn’t quite clear to me. Kinda shock that almost all are doing it while outside the mask of society rules, rules, rules usually hit you right back.

Which rules are right anyway? The new trend or the old ones?

Personally I have no grudges on the third sex thing. Got loads of friends who are practicing it and I respect the decision and actions they make. The disturbing part is that some people kinda went overboard just well to get attention. My first guess is usually attention from others, so that people will notice you. Let’s face it some people are hunger for fame, even it is in the direction of lameness.

It’s hard to stop since its trending, I don’t call it love… I usually see it as an excuse or a ticket to get attention. For some reason my cousin’s friend had this weird experience of an ex boyfriend. Typically the ex was just courting the girl just to get close with the girl’s guy friend. Hard right? Using someone just to get what he wants. Indeed it’s cruel. Worst part is that the girl is already in love with the gay guy. So this means that the poorest sex would be the straight females. Anyways this life isn’t a competition. The problems lies on the stuff people do. Turning into a casual thing. We can say it’s ok since everyone is doing it but when someone close to you is a victim, think again.

Exhibit A: some really enjoy this

One thing I hate about this third sex stuff is that some people usually label a good looking guy gay! Just because the guy is clean, neat and well do things slowly. Is there any standards for it? I don’t know any more if which is which since mostly some of them are true and some of them are bogus. The things people do.

Exhibit B: fan service? i dunno

The worst part is forcing stuff that are kinda not cool to look at. Like the pictures above,the good atmosphere on a good picture I’m looking at is ruin. Or like some celebrities forcing to kiss onstage just to get publicity. Hence if you have a boyfriend, you better watch out for thieves on both sexes. As for the singles, you better look clearly unto the ones you like.

Meet the Yaoi

The male to male lovemaking. There are lots of anime out there previewing this and sometimes it’s not cute anymore. I get disturbed for longer periods but I can’t help it to stop popping it out of no where. It's like the females enjoying their form of porn as well.[source]

Meet the Yuri

The female version of yaoi. I have no idea which is better or sicker? when it comes to animes or drawings it usually doesn't offend me. I think it depends on the art but when you see it in real life; disturbing actually… [source]

Even after reading this post over and over again so that it won’t sound like gender biased, I can’t helped it. If this is a sexism kind of post or you find it streotypish kind of way..sorry…I dunno… opinions are on my head. Alarming on what I am actually seeing at the world right now.

I don’t know when this will stop but I just hope that innocent lives will be spared. There are lots of ugly stories out there revolving this category. Hitting two at one at a time, I guess lust is a strong sin.

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Speechless

Really God has some crazy ideas to turn up my day. Really I’m lucky to have such amazing friends who were there. Reality check! I didn’t spend a single dime on it! Waaaah I don’t know I guess this is my first time experiencing a surprise that made me blush… literally.

my very own 22 birthday cake

I have no idea about it which was the weird part. To me it was an ordinary get together for the three of us, never knew that my non-biological brother or the pretty Chinese girl who still has boyish voice will be there! That blow my mind away as in… never felt sincerely happy for a long time actually. I know when you hang with these guys before for like 24/7 it was kinda normal. Then again as time let you walk different paths, miss those normality of hanging out with those people that the memories are still intact and the conversations of endless start rolling in. It never occurred to me to happen in that way.

all i could say was eeeerrrrrr????

The cake had got to be the most amazing part to me. I was laughing myself out since why there got to be a cake? Then Lara mentioned about a picture with a 22 cake on it on my posts. WTH! It was sort of a cliché exactly when I thought of the label of that picture. Yet my 22 cake isn’t bad! Very yummy and still had the chance to eat it for real!

We had a humongous pizza, drink a little for booze and sang our hearts out. Well the singing part was totally me and Lara only. Hahahha well they were kinda like the talking part, sharing some questions to one another and celebrating single hood and partnership. Basically we talked about life and making money. Yeah the making money part was the unforgettable part for me since I must have a job in no time soon. Since we only had one male accomplice, we let him do the talking on stuff guys do. Pretty decent and I’m proud of my non-biological brother for it. Mama can’t be there though since she had work.

Back at my head I was thinking of how. How can I ever repay such things? I’m really a loser on that stuff I don’t know I have no idea on speaking out so I hid it and write stuff on a paper of publish it on a blog. Speechless. If I could make everyone happy at that time with my own ability instead it was the other around. I’m really grateful yet I feel awful at myself that they should be the ones to have the free loads from me, not the ones before. If you keep track on my blog you know who I’m talking about. But yet my hands are allergic to money. They keep getting away from me. Seriously I need to fix them. Come to think of it, this is what you get when you try separating friends. I dunno I really have hard time dealing or mixing up with old and new ones. It’s just that maybe I’m scared of misunderstandings of one another since I act differently to other people. Guess that got me thinking but then again that would never stop me repaying them somehow. I am a sucker for promises and yet I can’t keep them. I just hope that time would be my best friend in the near future with some cash hehehe.

Chinese girl (Dan) and Lara

Non-biological Bro(Ken) and Carmi

Yet that doesn’t stop me from enjoying the rest of the night. Even at home my brother and cousin were the ones who nailed the leftovers. Typically they were sleeping already but when I said food, they were like pigs attacking hahahha. No seriously I pig out too since the cake was so delish!

Proves one thing; true friends need no constant communication. As long as you still can sit down, have a nice time and do some crazy shit together I’m happy. When you can’t see each other for a long time, change usually can be bitter; in a sense that you have no idea who the person is neither good nor bad. What I find it amazing is that the true friends I usually find are the ones who maybe physically change but on the insides are the same craziness who I befriended 5 years ago. Ahhhh that is genuine.

It was an unexpected day of august. Like what people said, that this year’s august is special because of the five weekends and Friday the 13th. My birthday is on 5th of this month, and yes I am lucky…

PS: thanks Lara for the pictures to add on the crazy day :D

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2 decades and 2 years

I am officially another notch away from my teen years. Really I guess the teen years would be my most memorable ones yet. Never had any ideas on how I handled those dramas, laughs and pains by being me. Everyone has a different version of themselves.

wish I had my actual birthday cake on that day

After 2 decades and 2 years in the business of my life, I only noticed slow changes though. Physically I am the same as ten years ago, mentally I have been a slacker to my own thinking, spiritually low in my practices but have strong faith on the Lord, socially has increased skills in dealing with strangers, and emotionally stable as of now that is. Really I should thank myself for that I have become a person that my parents aren’t a shame of. I do have some secrets that they have no idea with. And yeah I’m still chained to them like a goat, financially.

spending Eat All You Can at Zao, Guadalupe

My parents were kinda generous on my natal day. They had given me a little money to spend on my own. So I decided to treat with my most lovable there is in the mortal world; food. Food has never disappointed me. My cousins thought about the idea so I spend a thousand on that one. Only half a thousand left. That was suppose to be my gift like some pair of shoes perhaps yet the day dragged me on spending it with high school friends. Quite ironic, my original close friends in high school aren’t there anymore but still we do have communication. I kinda want to spend my day again with them if I’m to be honest. Yet time let me introduce more on some of my classmates that ended up having to be with them. These guys are quite ok but nothing can replace the closest ones before. Good for them that they were allowed to be in Cebu just to unwind from work, no way in hell am I allowed that kind of unwinding. So there I have no money left for me and they were kinda eager on having this small time reunion, so I wasn’t regretting it.

at Brew's Point and Diva Karaoke

On the same day, bad news went around with my roommates. My cousin got her phone stolen on the jeepney. I was having a hard time mentally accepting it since the moment she told me through a call I thought she was laughing. Yeah I was a meany but really I don’t know how to handle some situations like that, hate being the eldest though. The shit part would be a pain for her. Telling her mom wasn’t an easy task since they have their own issues too. Really I want to butt in and defend on her since her mom is pressing her too hard. Seeing her talking to her mom on the phone and then hang up is kind of a way that she’s punishing her child unfairly. Hearing stuff that she would be transferred to another school or returning home because she broke her trust. I don’t get it, she should be thankful that her daughter is ok. Just for one lousy accident, she said some things about that. Really my cousin is not even like me, the one who tells lies on my parents sometimes just to get on my way! She’s a better child with that. I have no idea how my grandmother raised her children but that is just plain awful. Her mom should consider that her child is on the process of learning like that. Yes these words are one sided and I have no idea on what the other party have reasons with. I just want to defend a person who is not guilty about. Plus her mom and my dad are somehow similar but my mom is the one who balances stuff like that on the four of us.

My day turned out fun and with a lesson. Clearly I have 2 pending events that I should spend with people I love. The financial problem would be a pain but it would be worth it.

One thing that amused me earlier on my birthday was that someone greeted me unexpectedly. For years he never greeted me and that goes for me to him as well. It’s no biggy but kinda surprising.

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Ping Me: an Update

This would be just an update to what I’m busy with.

First my eligibility for NCLEX had arrived and that I surely taking a serious mode on the review thingy. So my schedule is tight with watching anime or series and reading mangas still intact. I’m so happy that I am able to reach katekyo hitman reborn’s latest episode. As of the moment, the latest episode is 190. Just 20 episodes to go and that I’m done, pure stream and that veoh player was my alibi on this. As for the mangas, kurushitsuji is so damn slow on the progress but the latest chapter is pretty good.

yes its cracking...
image by morrighan03

As for the other aspect, my brother has its own laptop and my cousin has a new notebook too. That leaves to me the eldest with the old pc. Damn! Just you wait for earnings and I’ll buy my own laptop. Still on bargaining my father not to disconnect our smartbro and to buy a router to have wifi! Inches to make him say yes hahahaha

Fifa is on the corner. The team I’m betting is still alive! Go argentina! I hope you do good on the quarter finals… betting on Gonzalo Higuain to do that stuff! Spain isn’t bad also plus those Germans do know how to play a good game with the crowds wowing!

Back to NCLEX, I’m having trouble with my friend wait frenemy on when to take the NCLEX. I wanted to take it on September, she wanted to take it on August. August is still early for me since I started second week in June to get my studying straight! Plus she’s the one who decided to stop with the review! If only I decided to ditch her, but that would be rude. My brain hurts, wanting to take with her or should I take alone. My mom bets on taking alone just to make sure. Her mother doesn’t allow her to extend, but I already gave up time on for her to decide but taking it early is a very huge risk. Not only that it’s expensive, but a one time take since the California state requires their state’s SSS number. I can’t do that! I’m still sticking September as my target month, I’m just being careful not reckless. The worse part is that the reason she wants an early take is that a hospital already called her and took the exam. I wasn’t even able to pass the requirements because I was afraid that it would clash on my exam date. Plus she’s not even sure if she passed the exam. It’s not my problem, I already told her that possibility but she pursued it anyway. I don’t want to go with her decision since she already made a wrong one before. I answered her that by the end of July she would get an answer from me.

its a love angle not triangle
image by iann7

This isn’t my business but I can’t stand it. Regards to my brother on his new chic he found. You see this chic was the same person my brother’s best friend tried to court. He failed but didn’t give up that yet. As for one thing my brother, his best friend and this chic are classmates so ultimately they would see each other in school. The best friend however kinda let it slide of courting the chic since he always gets busted. I don’t know if my brother asked any permission or had any closure with his best friend but they stop talking after my brother when for that chic. As for that chic, I don’t know. I feel irritated I mean she obviously know that they are super close friends what the hell he said yes to my brother. As for my brother, what on earth was he thinking ditching his long time friend for a girl! Man its like total wreck, another good relationship went down because of that. I have nothing against that chic, it’s that her action made me judge right away that she has a defect or something. Typing about it makes me annoyed but I can’t stand it! My own brother blinded with that! Typically that couple won’t last knowing my brother but then again I don’t about his best friend though. I even told my brother that clearly he’s the wrong guy on this scenario. He just laughed and won’t listen. Fine then go for the hard way.

Feels kinda relief after those paragraphs. As for other updates, I’m still being jailed for debts! When will this horror ends. Stupid stupid me for being suck a weakling on food! July is here and time time time is oh so precious. Procrastinating should stay away! I miss my friends, the close ones and that spending with frenemy is the only choice I got to be able to remind myself the horrible thing if I fail!

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Musings of a Short Hair

After 5 years of wearing a long lock, I had cut it and returned to my young self. The term young meaning reminiscing the old school days no worries of getting dirt on my face, having knee wounds or sporting my fave shirt even if my belly pops around it. Simplicity was the key as long as no one gets hurt.

It wasn’t a big deal to chop off some hair, I mean its hair, and it will grow back. I don’t get it about other females dreading over cutting off their locks. Hmmmm yes hair does make our faces well kinda have an oomph to it. Plus it also fools men of disguising like some people who are cross dressers. Speaking of cross dressers, I just wander why most lesbians are bigger women? They tend to look like oversized children with pigmented nipples. Why do they have to look like that? Well lesbians who are sexy are the scarier ones to me. I have friends like that but beware when they got drunk hahaha. Plus the male specie will have a live show to their pleasing.

before and now

Back to hair! I like mine short thank you very much. Mostly people in college who are used of seeing me long, well criticisms can’t escape. Especially that I’m getting fatter and browner (wait brown can be an adjective? WTH). Yeah plus I really look like the adult version of Dora. I kept on telling myself that karma had backstabbed me since I always despise that kiddie show. Seriously have you seen those episodes? It’s like teaching your kids pointing stuff! Pointing! I’ll stick to my yellow friend Spongebob Sqaurepants.

I did have doubts at first since my mom usually judges me on everything I do. Surprisingly, she jus laughed. It’s like me acting like childish ”daw”. Fine when I act all cute & cuddly that I call childish, which will never happen in a million years. Too much cuteness makes me sick. Examples are those care bears, man it’s like they the worst version of the teletubbies. I can’t even tolerate those teletubbies, hahahha reminds me of the gay purple one that always carry a handbag. When I was in elementary, a few friends of mine like to kick the mascots that visited our school. We would all ran like hell when the person behind the mascot takes off its big head and sends an angry grin on us. Maybe there’s some anti-cuteness in my sytem. My brother also shares the same passion but he’s more of a killer when it comes these.

anti-cuteness system

The good side of having this hair, reminds me of high school a lot! All the comedy and drama I have been through made me what I am right now. Even if I’m still typing this I tend to put any sidelines aka what my brain contains on each paragraph. Memories are all I have right now and these are helpful in times when my emo-ish side breaks loose. Drama queen? Ewwww hate that. Role confusion age I guess is till fresh on my mind. To think this would be the end part when my original topic was about hair!

high shcool reunion

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